Pancreas Gland - Spiritual Function - Kundalini - Slow Control Sanity - Desire Passion Faith - Self-Confidence - Safety And Relevance Of Spiritual Development For The Modern Era
Summary
The pancreas gland's spiritual function is to transform pure consciousness into a form of life-supporting subtle energy. Dreams of emotional and sexual union are highly auspicious in nature. Most people are burdened with heavy, unliberating emotional dispositions. It is extremely important, for the sake of sanity, for spiritual aspirants to be able to slow or "control" kundalini's progress in its transformation of their body and mind. There is a physical toll on the human body that the kundalini process exacts due to the corpse- or death-like physical condition it frequently requires. It is important that spiritual seekers have access to high quality foods, natural environments, and time for reflection. It is imperative that you develop a strong but flexible mind.
There is a unified, metaphysical dimension to awareness, ultimate reality, duality, energy, and light.
As a vehicle for spiritual transformation, a heartfelt desire and yearning is superior to purely mental concentration. Spiritual aspirants must possess the self-confidence and the conviction that they deserve divine intervention in their lives. Such confidence, conviction, and faith are necessary precursors to kundalini awakening.
Answers the question, "In the modern era, whatwith GMO, cellular radiation, social media, and aerosol spraying of heavy metal nanoparticles, is spiritual development safe or even relevant?" (12/25/2013)
Kundalini Awakening - Spiritual Signs And Symptoms / Spiritual Commentary / Tape Transcriptions - Tape #22 - November 6, 1994
1994.11.6. Sunday. (tape #22, continued)
(hiking) My stomach and solar plexus are expanding some. I can feel my gut becoming more prominent. There is a feeling of settling and relaxation down there. It feels stronger -- and it feels good.
Increasingly, as I eat honey or some other source of sugar, I am finding that it is redundant. What I mean is that I am having these intuitive feelings that I don't need the sugar for energy. This happened the other day when I was eating a lot of honey with my bread. I felt that the boost of energy I needed to send me off hiking wasn't necessary. There was a feeling that my stomach, solar plexus, and pancreas were already engaged in some process that would give me all the energy I needed -- without eating. This intuition or sensation has empowered me, and has made me extremely optimistic. I believe that my pancreas is somehow converting spiritual energy -- direct consciousness -- into a force that can sustain the activities of my muscles and mind. What I think is happening is that as consciousness flows into my solar plexus it is being transformed by my pancreas into a holistic energy source for my entire body and spirit. This pancreatic harnessing of pure consciousness is not yet working at one hundred percent efficiency -- not even close. But I feel that's the direction that this process is taking me. If this can happen -- and I am very excited by this -- then my diet will be liberated. I will be able to eat more pure, live foods -- and probably less food overall. I will start to glow more, and have more energy for thinking and being and doing. I won't be so bogged down by digestion, sleep, and other gross needs.
I orgasmed in my sleep last night. I was with a woman. We had our clothes on. As she pulled me closer to her, I felt our bodies line up and our trunks press firmly against each other; I felt our pelvises, stomachs, and chests press closely together. She pulled my head to hers and we made out. I told her that I wanted to come. She was a little disappointed, but she said okay. So I came, even though I wasn't inside of her.
This brings to mind a dream journal I used to keep sometime ago. I had several dreams in which there was a feeling of intense love between a woman and me. They were very sensuous, voluptuous, emotionally fulfilling dreams. I have no doubt that dreams like that are always a good sign: They reflect a subconscious that's oriented toward love and fulfillment.
(still hiking) I've been massaging these two areas under my lower jaw: the fleshy area just on the inside of the jaw along the tongue and toward the neck. There are all sorts of sensitive things there. There must be some kind of gland function in addition to salivary going on there. Or at least, subtle essences must flow from the brain down through them and on to the throat. I definitely feel some activity there now that is not exclusively salivary in nature.
I wanted to comment on the heaviness of some of the personalities that I work with. It's difficult for me to verbalize exactly what I feel when I encounter these people. I won't name names, but there are about eight teachers and therapists that immediately come to mind as emotional antagonists. I deal with these people every day. In sum, these people -- I could say ladies because they are all ladies, but so are most of the school's employees, so any sample I took would be skewed toward women -- are very emotionally heavy. When they talk with one another, their discussions often revolve around the problems in their lives. There is an invariably hushed, heavy tone to their discussions, as if they were gravely passing ponderous lead objects back and forth. The vibe is that of an emotional black hole; so I do my best to skirt such darkened gatherings, thereby avoiding being caught and pinned by their absorbing emotional intensity.
But there is an upside to the heaviness: These teachers are very committed to the students. In fact, they're some of the best teachers at the school. They work longer hours than I do, have better classroom management skills, and do a better job preparing lessons. I mean, they take everything -- their work, their lives -- extremely seriously. I'm probably superficial -- even too carefree -- by comparison. But my problem is that it is very hard for me to just say "hello" to one of these people and then walk on by: I feel like I immediately have to plant myself among them and engage in their heavy emotional trip -- not because I want to, but because the energy of their interaction pulls me in. It makes me weak-kneed thinking of these people. They are tougher than I am. They're not at all light-hearted. I always feel very tired after speaking to them, because at every turn I am trying to inject humor into the conversations. Rarely am I successful. I may get a shallow laugh or a half-smile from them, but it doesn't get too much better than that. But I trust these people: They're good people. They're ethical; they have a strong sense of responsibility. In fact, they care about others much more than they do for themselves. But that can also be a problem, too. For them, life is truly a burden. And it doesn't seem like they're trying to do much to lighten their loads. They complain. Yes, they complain a great deal. They're always involving themselves in their coworkers' personal lives. They're all such heavy personalities. I find it very sad.
(later, still hiking) I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch -- and I don't want to appear excessively egotistical -- but I have this feeling inside of me -- a feeling of growing confidence. I really do think that I'm a good master of this spiritual process that's going on in me. Master might sound a bit strong; so let me clarify. To say that you're a "master" of this process is not really a positive thing. Kundalini, or call it cosmic consciousness: it's basically an infinite force that you're dealing with. The human body can't handle its full force -- at least not until the end, when your body and mind are dissolved, transfigured, in white light; and even then, you aren't "handling" it. The force is always greater than you. And the point at which you're ready to let the throttle go full-force -- well, you're over with -- you go up in a blaze of white light. Which isn't a bad thing. But timing is important. The point is to do some good work -- in the flesh -- while you are still alive as a being on this planet. The point is to use your heightened potential for the betterment of this world, for as long as you can. Millions of problems need addressing in order to make this world more hospitable to the fulfillment of life's purpose. So you don't want to run to the exit sign until it is time. Anyway, until you've adapted yourself to the energies present at the penultimate stages of this force's presence in the human body, its presence within you can drive you insane. So, what you're doing is repressing it in its progress through you. When you repress it, you're doing so largely through repressing your own life force -- physically, mentally, emotionally, what have you. And so, when I say I'm a master of this, basically all I'm saying is that, to a large extent, I've sacrificed my own physical and emotional well-being for, in a word, sanity. I've been pretty constant and sane throughout all of this process so far. I'm proud of that. Remaining sane: I think that's real important; so is being sensitive to the perceptions of other people. But the goal you're constantly battling with is letting this process flow with increased power and autonomy. As you perceive that your body and mind are ready -- emotionally, physically, what have you -- the pituitary gives the "go" signal and lets more energy flow. But it really needs to be bottled up a lot. Kundalini -- the name we have given to the process or the mechanism by which infinite consciousness is made aware of itself through the human form -- really knows no bounds. And so you can't let it run wild. Because it will; it will be like a forest fire out of control inside of you -- it will sear the hell out of you. You need a very strong mind -- a mind that needs to be open constantly to intuition; you need a mind that is open to doing what's best, and not just sticking to an intellectual idea. Your mind needs to be rebounding constantly off the reality of kundalini's ongoing development. You need a flexible, but firm mind.
(near the end of the hike; wind blowing, cars passing by) When I say "control" or "firm mind," I also mean an understanding of how to use the body properly, in terms of controlling the flow of energy within it. For instance, about an hour and a half ago, at the top of the hike, I felt really disoriented. I had been really relaxing my stomach -- letting it hang out, breathing deeply and diaphragmatically, and so forth. Doing this created, or allowed, an influx of energy inside of me. It was not a radiation energy -- which feels good; rather, it was a pure consciousness energy that didn't feel tethered to my body in any way. It was an energy, or a presence, that had nowhere to go. It was an energy that my mind and body had no connection to whatsoever. It was that lack of connection to who I am that was disorienting and scary. What I mean is that the sense of radiation I normally feel is what kundalini feels like when it's working with my body, adapting my body; but this was a pure energy that my body and mind had no feeling relationship to. It was like you've left the door open to your house and you turn around to find that a wild animal has wandered in and is about to damage your furniture and possessions because it has no idea how to behave in your house. The wild animal -- the pure awareness -- needed taming. So I guess I'm an animal tamer -- a tamer of unobstructed consciousness.
Anyway, I had allowed too much energy to flow into me. I didn't know what to do with it. I hadn't really brought it home yet in the form of radiation. I needed to tether it somehow to my subtle essences -- these mysterious workings of my nervous and endocrine systems. Up there at the top of the mountain I felt discombobulated -- and I hate that feeling. I hate not knowing who I am; I hate feeling untethered and surreal. So what I did in response to that, for the last hour or so, was tighten -- subtly -- my solar plexus and restrict my breathing to the point where I hardly breathed at all. I also kept as mentally still as I could -- staring with a blank mind rather than engage the creative thinking and problem solving that normally occupy me. Little by little, a feeling of confidence and joy -- of concreteness and wholeness -- began to return to me until I got to the point where I am now, where I feel comfortable speaking into this recorder again, feeling a strong sense of control return to me by the harnessing of this presence to my body.
You have to know how to use the body to harness this energy properly. It's a lot of work. It's a lot of give and take -- constantly. It's about letting more energy in until you feel uncomfortable, and then holding it, grounding it, adapting to it. Unfortunately, the grounding often means having to assume a corpse-like condition. I don't really know why; I have some ideas about it that I've shared before. The only thing that makes this all possible, at least physically -- the only reason why I'm not more of a wreck -- is because I have such a tremendous access and commitment to fresh air, wholesome food, and exercise. This demanding hike and its vital, fresh air have done wonders in terms of making this body fit to ground this incredible presence. If I had to assume this corpse-like condition cloistered in my room all day -- or in some other devitalized environment -- my hair would fall out and my skin would peel off from the heat from the frustrated energy inside of me. So, what I'm saying is that I've been able to balance the negative tendencies associated with having to make the body and its internal workings still like death. I've been able to achieve -- "balance" isn't really the right word -- almost a balance. There's still too much of a tendency toward death: My body is still paying too great a price, in my view, for managing this process. There is considerable strain here -- mentally and physically. But with all of this hiking and good diet, I've given as much resilience as I can to this body to resist the negative tendencies associated with this process.
I have to admit that I do love to accentuate and deepen this corpse-like condition. I love not breathing while I exercise: It's so grounding. It's fabulous. I become the death-less Self, walking the forest at night, without a noise, without a breath.
(later that night, laying in bed) Like I said before, kundalini is the mechanism by which Awareness makes the human body aware of Itself. But since this is an infinite awareness -- an awareness that permeates the universe -- and since human beings have a preponderance of gross and material aspects -- I can't really say whether what we are intuiting is of an ultimate nature. I can't say whether this presence we perceive is It. It seems to be; but it might be a close approximation of divinity, but yet not. This may be an entirely academic or irrelevant consideration, however; because, whether this process represents contact with the ultimate, or merely an approximation of that, it still represents the next stage in our evolution. It should still be taken utterly seriously; it is still worth devoting your life to. You should still go for it.
Just as you need the heart to pump blood and the digestive organs to digest food -- and just as you need everything else that plays a role in the functioning of the healthy organism -- so it is that all the endocrine glands are necessary to enliven the specific areas with which they are associated to create this symphony of higher awareness.
It seems that this awareness enters via the solar plexus and through some phenomenon brings life to your digestive organs -- or maybe it bypasses those at first and goes straight into your sexual region. I'm not sure what exactly the mechanism is that this process follows. I'm not sure what that burst of energy at the base of your spine is. I'm not sure what sets that all off.
Awareness is an invisible light. Physical light, the light that our eyes can see, is a mere sub-stratum of this all-encompassing presence. Awareness does not need to travel through the universe: It's already everywhere, all the time. This has always been the case.
Light from the sun is polarized; there is a dualism inherent in it: It can be blocked, reflected, captured. Awareness, on the contrary, is a living light: There is no dualism, no polarity -- it just is. It's the only thing in the universe that doesn't have an inherent opposite: It's the only thing that is absolute. It's a living presence that underlies everything.
The question comes up as to whether a rock is alive, or whether only biological organisms are, such as trees and fish. I like what Ramakrishna said on this one: that everything is alive -- that everything is suffused with awareness -- but that biological organisms have more of it. That is, even rocks have a spiritual presence, just as their atomic processes are in constant motion -- though they may appear, on the gross level, to be static. Ramakrishna made a special case for humans: Among biological organisms, humans have particularly concentrated amounts of this awareness. This is doubly the case with enlightened humans. So, in sum, this awareness permeates everything, but it is denser in some areas than others.
[An academic point from 12/16/2001: The universe is seamless and constant, though on many levels this appears to not be the case. Even at the point of transfiguration, the human being has no more energy or awareness than a rock, a fish, or a body of water of the same dimensions. All that is different is that more of the human being's potential energy is made active and self-aware. Does this mean that God exists more in the enlightened person than the bed she sleeps in? Ultimately, I don't think so. It would be dualistic for that to be the case.]
More clarification here.
Mental concentration is a very poor means by which to awaken divinity or awareness. Being able to concentrate is really just a quality that pertains to one specific region of the body -- namely, the brain. The finest way to awaken an awareness of God is through intense yearning or desire -- a whole body desire -- because it involves your emotions, your mind, and everything else. And that desire, taken as a context, involves certain dispositions that are all integral to this process: a focus of the mind, an opening of the heart, groundedness, determination, et cetera. It involves a concentration of your sexuality, too. All of these things are brought to bear as part of this desiring function within us.
When I awakened Shakti, I did it through sheer passion -- a great love and desire for God. I didn't have a clue about a lot of things about God. I didn't know what was going on. But that didn't matter: All that mattered was that I possessed a deep, abiding passion. But you also need a certain confidence to ask for God; you have to feel that it is something that you can handle -- and something that you want. You have to truly feel that you deserve some kind of divine intervention. I've learned a lot of things along the way, but they weren't necessary for that initial access or awakening to God. All I needed at the time was a very deep passion: That was the most important, the most critical thing.
Comment 12/23/2013
In The Modern Era, Is Kundalini Awakening Safe Or Even Relevant? Is Access To Wireless Internet A Meaningful Substitute For Spiritual Awareness? Socially And Spiritually, Are The Two Compatible?
Having been through what I've been through, and continue to go through, do I believe kundalini awakening is still something to strive for? Is seeking spiritual insight still a worthy and safe endeavor? Is our society's technology obsession hindering this effort? Will the arduous ages-old "spiritual quest" be replaced by simple access to wireless broadband? Is logging onto Facebook and other social media an improvement over the reception, amplification, and transmission of subtle energy? What does spiritual communion mean for a cyborg or some other human-machine hybrid that the technocratic elite are steamrolling towards? Is kundalini safe or even relevant in the modern era?
Well, these are the big questions, aren't they? I will address them from different vantage points as time passes. The danger of spiritual development -- and awakening kundalini -- are themes that seem to be gaining prominence. When you type "kundalini signs" or "kundalini awakening" into a search engine, there are more results that highlight the dangers of this process. Obviously, the raison d'être for kundaliniandcelltowers.com is to present the view that manmade wireless energy is toxic to the physiological adaptations that are associated with the descent of kundalini. The first order of business for me, then, is to make this world safe for spiritual development. Spiritual development will take care of itself if obstructions to its unfoldment are removed. At this site I do attempt to provide an overview of Kundalini's development within the body -- at least my body. My experiences may or may not make sense to people. I'll leave it to others to create a database cataloguing aspirants' experiences along different quadrants of "growth" or "experiential phenomena." I do contend that a pattern, if not a blue print, will emerge from this study. I hope to contribute to this discussion.
What would humanity do without a higher focus? We see that already. As all this evolutionary and aspirational energy is forced downward, and is thwarted from growth and release, we will see blockages and obsessions with all aspects of existence: celebrity, social status, clothing, style, consumerism, and gaudy displays of wealth. We will see the predominance of narrow forms of intellectual and physical activity that constrict or confine the higher development of the human bodymind. Even higher practices such as yoga and meditation will be debased in such a sick society. Without a deeper, broader context to place a person's interests in, people will be consumed by them and will fall into patterns of addiction and personal and social destruction. Without unfettered spiritual intuition running through all human activity, all that we do will become pathological and lead to individual and communal disease. Two cases in point are our reliance on pharmaceutical drugs to mask our feelings, and genetically modified foods to "improve" upon God's creation, both of which exist at epidemic levels today. In both cases, the belief that science knows better than the spiritual wisdom that gave rise to Creation has lead to tremendous and worsening disaster. As this ignorance takes deeper root, what is good about humanity will rapidly disappear.
The point is that without a spiritual focus -- without the expectation that Grace guides our lives and that true wisdom lies in obeying this Voice, or at least listening to it -- humanity will be destroyed by the civilization it creates.
I do believe that all of our experiences are heard by -- and resonate with -- some kind of morphogenetic field (*). This doesn't mean necessarily that God will intervene on our behalf; but it does mean that no one experiences or dies in vain. Everyone's experiences in the world are taken into account in the direction that evolution -- propelled by God of course -- takes. The evolution of any species is not a random event, but rather Spirit's direct response to the collective experiences of its members.
So, my hope is that my ongoing suffering down here is of interest to the guy (or gal) upstairs. I am hopeful that future generations will be better able to cope with EMF pollution if Nature has determined there is a problem and that the human body -- with all of its incredible potential -- needs to be adjusted. Maybe an enlightenment of the whole body is compatible with cellular transmitters shoved up your nose and anus. But I've made the point elsewhere that EMF pollution is to the spiritual mechanism as car exhaust is to the lungs. Too much car exhaust will kill you. Period. Carbon monoxide, simply put, is antithetical to the healthy functioning of the lungs. Similarly, the human body is put equally at risk if in its more advanced stages of spiritual development it is placed in close proximity to manmade EMF. The earth's magnetic field and solar radiation (that includes visible light and infrared or heat) are frequency ranges that are meant for human and spiritual consumption. Millions -- even billions -- of years of evolution has made this so. It has been my experience that radio and microwaves are just as harmful to the spiritual antenna that blossoms with the descending kundalini (post not online), as carbon monoxide is to any creature's lungs. If we send billions of humans to a chamber to be suffocated by combustion engine exhaust, will Evolution decide to create lungs that can withstand this exposure? Maybe, maybe not. And in what timeframe? Soon enough to prevent the extinction of our species? Usually, modifications to the human body via DNA and other physiologic processes occur at a glacial -- or slower -- rate. Will a future aspirant like me -- one hundred generations hence -- be better able to handle the electrical overcharge that exposure to wireless creates? I can only hope so. The longer I persist and cling to this ridiculous life of mine, the greater I hope will be the impact of my personal experience on the collective wisdom and spiritual force at work in this world.
However, one problem I have with this hope is the naive and arrogant expectation that God will correct humanity's terrible errors -- that God / Evolution / Nature will be accomodative of our many abuses, and thereby relieve individual human actors of the need to do something about this matter themselves. Another problem is that EMF pollution's toxic impact, for example, is not limited to the subtle nervous system. Tens of thousands of known physiological and biochemical effects due to wireless electromagnetic exposure have been documented. The establishment says these effects are benign and have no direct connection to disease, behavioral changes, cognitive impairment, harm to bees and birds, or vascular dysfunction in plants. But then it is this same establishment that stands to benefit from the military activity, cashless digital currency, and wireless surveillance grid that such technology makes possible. The argument against cell towers, while it has spiritual motivations, should principally be one of gross physiologic health and personal privacy.
People like to think that God will somehow win the day here on planet Earth. They claim that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. They believe that righteousness shall overcome -- that the forces of Light shall overcome, or at least balance, the forces of Darkness. Sadly, I am not confident about any of this. It might be the case that on a purely physics basis there will be a countervailing response to the water fluoridation, heavy metal aerosol engineering, nuclear radiation, cancer-virus-laced vaccines, and genetic manipulation of everything humans consume; but it doesn't necessarily follow that the human species will survive this assault. Maybe Nature's response to this simply will be to make life uninhabitable to higher life forms such as homo sapiens. Maybe erasing us and all the more advanced mammal species will be the balancing and opposing response to the myriad attacks on the biosphere. The eugenicist elite think they know better and can behave without conscience or concern regarding the impact of their actions. There will be a response, including a Divine response, to this. It's just that I am not sure that Homo Sapiens -- "Wise Man" -- will be around afterward.
But no changes that humans make are permanent. Divine intelligence will never leave. God has never, and will never, abandon us. I figure that after 1000 generations, if left to themselves, most of the GMOs that we have introduced to the world will be brought into alignment with Natural and Spiritual Balance. That the organisms cause so many problems is a sign of stress and imbalance. Nature will correct that over time. The genetically modified organisms' DNA will be modified by a deeper wisdom that seeks homeostasis and spiritual awakening. But the time frame for this process may be longer than so-called Homo Sapiens can withstand.
Choose your side. Get to work. What you do does matter. There are a million problems facing this world. Do something about one of them now.
May God light your path.
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