Limitations Of A Physically Attractive Woman - Are Amazing Breasts Sufficient To Sustain A Relationship? - Sometimes Being Alone Is The Best Thing

Just another take from my "inner asshole" regarding how everyone I meet is a drain or a nuisance to me. Nothing came of this interaction because, as usual, I prefer the company of my own deluded internal dialogue.

Social Criticism - July 29, 1997


I saw X [today]. She leaned over ostensibly to show me her amazing breasts. She does have excellent ones, and nice legs and a pretty face as well. I would definitely ask her out but for the glaring issue of her relating to herself primarily as a physically attractive woman. I need more than breasts to get turned on. Emotionally I find her muted -- not quite dead, but definitely uninspired. How can I get along with someone without emotional vitality? Maybe another way to describe my dilemma is to say that she has a lower vibration than me -- that the energy between us would constantly be flowing downward from me into her. I am tired enough without an emotional-sexual drain of the most profound sort. Plus, she has a child that seems a bit dull to me. I would likely have to spend countless hours attempting to instruct and inspire the child. No can do. Also, while disposed somewhat blandly toward health foods and spiritual issues, I find her unchallenging intellectually. There is not a vigorous contact of minds when I talk with her. Simply put, I just don't find her terribly smart. She is good girl, with a caring heart, but she does not rock me. I would be hopelessly bored with her. But fuck! Those breasts and that ass and that pretty face -- it would be worth a lot to have her on top of me once in a while. Waiting for the right person is becoming increasingly unbearable. I have come to the conclusion that my life is so complex and burdensome and extraordinary that I cannot share it with anyone unless I meet someone extraordinary in her own right. Also, I would become immensely more available if I didn't have to toil as a public school teacher and instead derived my income from being an eccentric holy man with a book in the marketplace that lays out who I am and where I am coming from. Until then, I think it would be a waste of time to involve myself with another person.



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